A perfect gift for anyone
who annoys you.
What you get:
(1) the Mercy Stone replica.
(2) An ancient looking BOOK that includes many things on this website and a bunch more information on euthanasia and suicide.
(3) Access to the “Whack-Yourself”webpage.
(4) You get fast and friendly service.
(5) And a card, to send along with the Mercy Stone replica to the person who has pissed you off.
There is room for additional angry rants from you. This is what the cards says on it:
I found this useful,
hope it helps you.
Of course you probably don’t need to come out and say that the recipient ought to whack himself with the real Mercy Stone.
No doubt the person who gets the Mercy Stone replica will understand that, but you could always spell it out. Especially if you are not overly PC.
Hint: never threaten to kill anyone, even in jest. Especially in writing.
If you throw the Mercy Stone at someone they’ll duck.
Be careful because you can really scare someone.
If you throw it at their car window, they’re going to scream in horror.
In reality The Mercy Stone replica is made of a non-toxic foam that is very light and is actually a stress ball in the shape of a rock that fits easily in your hand—it’s great for getting rid of tension and stress.
So if you are thinking about murdering someone this might help you get over such homicidal tendencies. And sending the Mercy Stone to the person you are annoyed with will certainly let them know how you feel.
You can build muscles by squeezing The Mercy Stone and even though it looks like rock, it’s very gentle on your hands and fingers.
We guarantee The Mercy Stone for your lifetime. The way you get rid of tension is to squeeze The Mercy Stone.
If you’re pissed off a lot you might squeeze it a 100,000 or a 1,0000,000 times —when you say it’s worn out, we’ll send you a new one.
As a matter of fact you can will it to your children and we’ll guarantee The Mercy Stone replica for all of their lives.
Of course we have a nominal handling and mailing fee of $7.00.
Not bad when you consider that we charges $19.95 for the Original Mercy Stone replica. But that came beautifully boxed, with that special book that looks like it’s 200 years old if it’s a day. You can see the cover of the book on our web page.
And you get a beautiful ancient history of the Mercy Stone.
The book looks like it’s 200 hundred years old and the paper feels and resembles yellowed and aged parchment that has somehow survived the centuries.
It’s not parchment but it fooled us the first time. The second time too.
We also include information on the benefits of using your Mercy Stone replica stress ball. The health advantages seem quite beneficial to us.
We certainly don’t advocate killing or harming anyone with The Mercy Stone replica, we advocate laughter as a therapeutic release of tension.
And to that end we have put together a website that bubbles over with short humorous articles.
We promise not to sell or trade any information you give to us about yourself.
And we offer a money back guarantee.
So you get a funny look at euthanasia, some solid or at least semi-solid history, and a state of the art Stress Ball that might make you feel younger and keep you active.
Remember, you can also frighten someone by tossing your Mercy Stone at them, but we don’t advocate that.
We think the chances of harming anyone with this very light weight material are very slim.
But please use your common sense. Don’t throw at some old guy’s new Mercedes if he has a bad ticker.
(The original Mercy Stone ended
the life of countless Loved Ones)
The first written reference to the stone (or facilitator as it was called) was in 1151 AD. A parish priest in Europe used the Mercy Stone to end the life of Kathleen Dunlop,
82, with a single blow to the back of the woman’s skull…
Get Rid of Tension
Our Mercy Stone replica is a stress ball that
is a copy of the ancient and lethal weapon.
It’s a conversation stopper and a part of
the history of mercy killing or euthanasia.
Play catch with
The Mercy Stone replica,
use it to fight stress
or a pillow (tiny).
Toss it in the air, catch it on your
forehead and shake up your thinking.
Contemplate who needs whacking.
for the hand.
This way you may elect to buy two and we make twice as much money. Okay. Okay. We’ll give you a surprise gift.